One of our coaching members told me about an open house that was held over the weekend. A man passed by, gave me all his contact information, and said he also had a house he wanted to sell.
By the end of the open house, the seller had asked him to come and walk through the house and tell him how much he was going to make so he could put the money toward another place.
beautiful conversation. Clear the next step.
Then my coaching client said, “I was thinking of sending you the Seller Guide first.” So I stopped him.
When the seller invites you into the room, don’t put props between you and the seller. Whether this guide is the right thing to do depends on where the seller is actually located.
Here’s how I read the temperature of every prospect I meet
Imagine a confidence scale from 1 to 10. 1 FSBO I have never met. The neighbor who waves at me in the driveway is 2. 3 is the homeowner who wanders into an open house and casually mentions that they have a place to sell someday.
7 homeowners say, “Come look at the house and let me know what you take home.” There are 10 signed property listing agreements.
The mistake most agents make is treating all levels the same.
Same brochure Same guide Same handout Same email sequence
We reach for tools because they feel safer than conversation. Tools are something to hide behind.
There are only three places where guides really belong. Number seven is when the seller opens the door and invites you, the human, into the living room.
If you mail the guide and respond to 7, you have downgraded yourself. You took the relationship from 7 back to 3. You replaced yourself with a document.
Stage actors call this upstaging. If there are two actors in a scene, the actor who stands higher on stage will force the other actor to turn his back to the audience. The scene loses its center. Directors hate it. My co-stars hate it. Even if they can’t say the name, the audience can feel it.
When you put a guide between you and the seller who hires you, that prop steals the scene.
Real estate has its own version of upstaging. The seller has invited you because they need people, not packages. They want someone in their kitchen who can see the bones of their home and tell them the truth.
You can’t do that with a pamphlet. You can’t do that with PDF. If you can get props into their hands before you do, it will rank you up.
The number one reason agents reach for tools is because they feel safer with them. You can’t refuse a brochure like a human can. The guide remains in the inbox indefinitely, giving the agent the illusion that the lead is still warm. On the other hand, the seller side is already calm because nothing happened and there was no risk.
Trust scale playbook
Here’s a simple playbook. Read where your leads actually are on the scale and respond to that level. Do not overshoot. Don’t undershoot.
1 (cold leads or FSBO where they don’t know you) lead with distance and value. Send postcards, market statistics, and friendly testimonials. 1’s job is to become recognized, not closed. They see your name twice, then five times, then twenty times, and their trust scale automatically changes.
3 (open house attendee, casually mentioning future moves), a guide is best. Can be given as a gift without any conditions. “If you decide to do this yourself, I’ve prepared a guide that won’t bother you. Do you mind if I send it to you?” A guide builds trust by adjusting to the temperature of the relationship.
Once you’re seven (sellers will encourage you to walk through the house or run a phone number), skip the brochure. Skip email. Pick up the phone today and set up an in-person appointment. Please use their name. Please refer to the conversation. Suggest two specific times. The only product you have is you. 7 has a short shelf life. Tomorrow, another agent will call you and if you feel confident enough to visit, the door will be closed.
At point 10 (signing the listing agreement), bring the fiduciary, pricing data, and strategy. Trust is established. Now you serve. And please continue to serve. A signed list is not the finish line. If you handle it well, it’s the first day of a relationship that will earn you referrals for years to come.
The most common reason agents lose listings they were supposed to win is because of a misread temperature. They go to 7 with a 3 strategy. The seller was expecting a person. By the time the agent noticed the silence, another agent had already entered the kitchen.
The seller does not require any further information. they are drowning in it. Every other agent in town is sending out brochures, market reports, postcards, drip campaigns, and AI-generated newsletters. The seller has read enough.
What sellers lack is a calm, down-to-earth, knowledgeable advisor who comes into the kitchen, sits down at the table, looks you in the eye and tells you the truth about the home. That’s the kind of person they want to hire. They don’t hire guides. They hire experts.
Therefore, when the seller hands you the door, open it. Go through it. Don’t stop at the door and hold up the paper as if you’ve forgotten why you were invited.
In June, Inman takes a deep dive into the real estate team. What it takes to join a team, how to build a team worth joining, and yes, when to leave. During Teams Month, we’re bringing in some of the best team leaders in the country to bring you insights, frameworks, and hard-won lessons that don’t typically make their way onto highlight reels.
Daryl Davis, CSP, is a nationally recognized real estate speaker, bestselling author, and coach with over 40 years of experience in the industry. For more information, visit darrylspeaks.com.
