
What Darryl Davis is concerned about is what’s happening at the kitchen table. Real seller selection starts with real information. Agents should make sure the seller understands both sides of the strategy before signing.
Private listing wars might be funny if they weren’t so serious. Not so long ago, the industry was throwing tomatoes at brokerage firms that pioneered private listings. There were lawsuits, editorials, public condemnation, and righteous indignation.
And almost overnight, half of all agents in the U.S. were affiliated with companies that had formalized their own private listing strategies. And now they’re all gathered around the same table in the name of seller’s choice.
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I want to clarify my position. Search for my articles on Inman and you’ll find a consistent record. I support seller choice, support sellers’ right to privately list, and have a record of opposing clear cooperation policies against the harm caused by underground listings. That hasn’t changed even now.
What has changed is what is happening at the kitchen table. And that’s the conversation I want to have.
A choice made without complete information is not really a choice at all. This is a guided recommendation wrapped in the language of autonomy.
What actually happens at the kitchen table
Now, sellers across the country are meeting with listing agents who arrive with beautifully designed materials explaining the benefits of pre-market and private listing strategies. The materials are professional grade. The argument is persuasive. And the benefits are real. You have more privacy, fewer foot traffic, no days of pre-market risk, and one trusted agent handling all buyer conversations.
For the right seller in the right situation, these benefits really matter.
The conversations I look for in agents are honest, balanced presentations, not scary statistics lectures. Something like:
“There are real benefits to this approach: less confusion, fewer strangers in the home, and one person handling all buyer conversations. The tradeoff is that limiting who sees the home early on can affect how much you compete on price. Some sellers decide these benefits are worth it. Others want full market exposure from day one. I want you to make that decision in front of both parties.”
Today, such conversations don’t happen consistently at restore points. Most sellers only hear about the positives. And sellers who hear only the positives haven’t actually made a choice, they’ve just been presented with a recommendation.
Market testing argument doesn’t hold up
One of the most common arguments for a private-first approach is that it allows sellers to “test the market” before going public, validating prices and creating early demand without accumulating days on the market.
But what does it mean to test the market? Real market testing means exposing your product to the market (the entire market) and measuring its reaction.
If a listing is visible only to buyers connected to a brokerage firm’s internal network, it is not a market test. It’s a focus group within one company. The results will show you how a specific pre-selected audience responded to your home. It tells us nothing about what the entire market of competing buyers would offer given the same opportunity at the same time.
Testing prices within one brokerage network is not testing the market. It tests one corner of it and calls the results market intelligence.
Real Benefits and Necessary Conversations
Private listings offer significant benefits to some sellers. Low foot traffic and smooth transactions are real benefits for sellers who prioritize discretion and convenience. For sellers with young children, privacy concerns, or complex personal circumstances, these benefits are real and worth considering.
Honest agents show both sides. Here’s the real benefit and here’s the trade-off. Limiting the buyer pool can affect how much competition there is, which can affect the final price. The seller has the right to consider it before making a decision rather than discovering it after closing.
My concern is not what the broker is doing. Brokers are building systems that work for their businesses, and large brokerages that develop internal platforms and portal partnerships are making rational business decisions.
What I’m worried about is the kitchen table. The agent sitting across from the homeowner has a fiduciary duty to act in that seller’s best financial interest. This obligation includes making sure the seller understands both sides of the strategy before signing.
Real seller selection starts with real information.
Darryl Davis is the CEO of Darryl Davis Seminars. Connect with him on Facebook and YouTube.
